bethmaher

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Illustrator, designer, lover of kitties, fine cheeses, screwball comedies and boys named Liam.

I am interested in finding art and inspiration in everyday and unexpected places.

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3 Nov 11

A difficult but must-read on what we teach women, following "rules," and rape

It’s a rude fucking awakening when a woman gets raped, and follows the rules she has been taught her whole life — doesn’t refuse to talk, doesn’t refuse to flirt, doesn’t walk away ignoring him, doesn’t hit, doesn’t scream, doesn’t fight, doesn’t raise her voice, doesn’t deny she liked kissing — and finds out after that she is now to blame for the rape. She followed the rules. The rules that were supposed to keep the rape from happening. The rules that would keep her from being fair game for verbal and physical abuse. Breaking the rules is supposed to result in punishment, not following them. For every time she lowered her voice, let go of a boundary, didn’t move away, let her needs be conveniently misinterpreted, and was given positive reinforcement and a place in society, she is now being told that all that was wrong, this one time, and she should have known that, duh.

This applies to more than rape. This applies to women in every area of their lives. Social conditioning is what makes us fight with each other when we should be fighting the patriarchy, it’s what keeps us from breaking the glass ceiling. It’s what kept me from getting diagnosed with learning disabilities and ADHD as a kid.

It is the source of almost EVERYTHING feminists fight against. I’m re-blogging this everywhere I can.

(Source: sodisarmingdarling)

  1. bethmaher reblogged this from sodisarmingdarling and added:
    This applies to more than rape. This applies to women in every area of their lives. Social conditioning is what makes us...
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